Never the Bride by Paul Magrs

This is the first in a four-book series.

Never the Bride is set in the famous literary town of Whitby. The main characters are Brenda and Effie who end up in awkward situations.

Brenda is full of life, with a past she choses not to tell anyone about – mainly she doubts they will believe her or will end up running her out of town.  She tuns a B&B which is cosy, quiet and efficiently run. Her morning routine is one of ensuring her make up is on just right and her wig looks it’s best.

Effie is funny in her tactlessness; she lives in the house next door to Brenda and runs a junk shop in the lower rooms. Her house is filled with books on magic and the paraphernalia that goes along with it. Effie herself wants nothing to do with the magic and has ‘distanced’ herself from it. No one knows her family line consists of many witches. However, she begins to realise that magic has not ‘distanced’ itself from her.

The first mishap that they encounter is when their usual waitress – Jess - at the ‘Christmas Hotel’ is looking 20 years younger and is acting as if she was 20 years younger. Effie decides to investigate the ‘Deadly Boutique’ that Jess visited, and havoc occurs. Although there is something tantalising about the boutique, but also something unnerving. Brenda and Effie then make another visit and all hell breaks loose.

For some visiting the ‘Christmas Hotel’ and enjoying Christmas anytime of the year may be a wonderful plan, but beware this one is dowdy, grubby and the elves are not as joyous as they should be. The owner rules the roost with staff and guests well under her thumb.

My favourite location in the book is a trip down memory lane to ‘Woolworths’ and their pick n mix – maybe that’s the reason I like the sound of the ‘Deadly Boutique’.

The friendship between Brenda and Effie is tested with a debonair gentleman comes to town and takes a shine to Effie.

The best of the book for me is my imagination linking a village and its Martian visitor with ‘War of the Worlds’ and offspring ensuing, the mind boggles at how that occurred though.

Whitby wouldn’t be the same though without its most famous literary visitor who is not as he once was. He has changed beyond all imagination.

The ending reminds me of a once watched horror movie, when I was a teenager and I didn’t sleep for days.

The location of Whitby is brought to life by the language used and its atmosphere is charged. The characters are wonderfully written and the interactions between them dances of the page.

Brenda is all for a quiet life, something she has always been short on, but it seems ‘fate’ has other ideas. Effie is prim and proper and believes her ‘respectability is vital to maintain her lifestyle. Stumbling into the ‘trouble’ which now surrounds her and Brenda is not welcomed but she takes a breath and accepts her role in the situation.

I cannot wait to read the second in the series.

If your looking for the weird and weirder then this is the book for you.